I've Fallen and I Can't Get Up! 5 ways to rise when you find yourself boobs-down in the gutt
What is it about energy, momentum, emotions, mood, mojo? You know what I am talking about right? One day your energy is buzzing, you can literally feel it. You have a spring in your step and there simply are not enough hours in the day to accomplish all your amazingness.
You feel like a super woman. Unstoppable, aligned with all the rainbows, unicorns and flowing haired mermaids; in the business of making magic happen.
And then...as quick as it arrived, it is gone again.
Sadly, not only are you back to net-neutral and in the land of OK (my personal cul-de-sac of numbness), but because of the high you were riding on yesterday, today you are boobs-down in the gutter of shame and self-doubt. Sadly, there is no glitter here. Not even a stray spec on your cheek left over from yesterday’s adventures.
This is me right here; right now. My week has had some amazing highs but also some equally deep lows.
So, what do you do when you’ve fallen and you can’t get up?
For me there are a few tried and true actions to take:
1) Move it; get up and get moving; as in physically move your body. I find getting outdoors in nature and simply connecting to the earth and my breath helps me slip into the moment and begin to shift. My nearly foolproof shifter is getting on my mat and practicing yoga. The most important part is to create physical movement in your body and encourage your endorphin to kick in. Also, it is hard to lie boobs-down in the gutter while dancing. Just the act of moving get's you at least upright!
2) Give; do something nice for someone else. The most instant mood elevator I’ve found is to perform an act of kindness for someone else. There is a lot of research being conducted on the positive effects of giving. Check out this article from Greater Good. I love how the study of positive psychology is changing lives! In my life, I find their is profound shifting when I stop focusing on me and shine my light out on others.
3) Go to bed; and sleep. I suppose doing other things in bed may help as well, but experts agree that enough sleep is one of the key factors in both mental and physical health. Personally, 100% of my gutter moments are preceded by a poor night of sleep. Life got you down? Try a nap, or an early bedtime.
4) Feel it; ugh I hate this one! As a thinker and as a self-proclaimed delayed feeler (I am working on it!), settling in and actually feeling the boobs-down gutter moment is new for me. I prefer a strong, “sweep it under the rug,” and keep doing other stuff tactic. I honestly believe that I can "do away" with emotions. The heavier the emotion, the more doing I embark on.
What I’ve learned with over 40 years of sweeping and doing, is that I am simply creating a bigger mess. A deeper gutter or pit of despair. The uncomfortable but powerful truth is to get out of the pit faster, you must learn the lesson. Make the change. Adjust your course. Accept that you are here for a reason.
I now work to try and honor the gutter or pit. To see it as the rest before the peak. Questions I ask myself and clients include: What happens if I wallow in here? What can I learn from this? What happened before?
5) Inspiration Hunt; look up, and look out for something that lights you up. I know I just said feel it (see number 4 above), but after that, get out and look for something to stoke your fires again. Read a book, watch a movie, drink wine with a friend, watch the sunset do something, do anything that brings you a small sliver of joy.
Once you taste the joy, and remember its sweet and smooth mouth-feel you’ll want more.
Glitter or Gutter? They both play a role in creating a Big Bold Life. Without the gutter, you’d forget to appreciate the glitter and I suppose with the right mindset the gutter can become a place of rest, recovery and perhaps even inspiration.
As for me, guess what? Today is a new day and after an early bedtime last night, and a windy tennis lesson this morning I feel so much better!
What works for you? I’d love to hear advice on how to rise from you all!